Saturday, January 3, 2009

Moving forward

Does everyone feel like this on the weekend after the new year begins? I seem to remember feeling this way all my life at this time of year. Kind of like "stuck" between the before and after.

Truly, it is only a mark in time - nothing more. There is nothing magical about starting a new calendar year. But somehow it seems like there should be, and I think there is the source of angst for me.

This year, at least, I feel that the previous year has brought me to this point in preparation for the upcoming one. And today, I feel like a runner must feel as she is prepared for the starting whistle. Trying to forget about all that brought me to this time except the important principles I've learned.

Our country is very unsettled, insecure. Indeed, there are a lot of unknowns for Safe Harbor right now, and for my family. Somehow, in this ocean of unsettledness, however, I feel a sense of calm and security that I've never experienced before. For sure, the pain and times of intense insecurity in this past year have served to anchor me in a harbor of trust. Trust in the character and closeness of my Father. I continually have before me the image from "Prince Caspian," as Lucy and Aslan prepare to face the thousands of enemy soldiers approaching them across the bridge. Lucy seems so confident with Aslan at her side, and yet she knows she may be called upon to fight. She pulls out her tiny little knife and draws herself up, glancing at the Mighty Lion at her side. Of course, God Himself rises up from the waters and the battle is quickly over.

I am so sure that God is with me, and that He cares about my family and about the women in my care. What intimacy to walk beside Him in trust! I must be willing to do my part, and surely there may be pain and injuries along the way. But there will be a victory banquet, and the noise of the battle will then be a dim memory.

So, I think He's ready. And I only know I want to be with Him. Where else would anyone want to be?

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